Just another shitty night

ای کاش میتونستم همین الان کارو تموم کنم ،،، تو‌یوتیوب ی ویدیو دیدم ک میگفت نگین میخام بمیرم بگین : میخام درد پایان پیدا کنه اوکی ، میخام درد پایان پیدا کنه ! میشنوی خدا ؟ داشتم فیلم "نگران نباش، من خوبم" رو نگا میکردم سکانس هایی رو میدیدم ک کرکتر اصلی فیلم ک هم اسم خودمم بود توی بیمارستان روانی بستری شده بود ، مادر و پدرش رهاش کرده بودن و تنها امید ب زندگیش "برادر دوقلوش" بخاطر دعوا با پدرش خونه رو ترک کرده بود، ملاقات ممنوع بود ، دائم میگفت برادرم مرده و منم میخام بمیرم ، چون اولین بار بود ک ب ادامه مطلب

I don't want they listen to my songs, I don't need a bunch of far away people, I need someone really close , really

where is my man ? I miss him

how can you miss someone you have never met ?
how am l so needy tonight?

There is only one reason that I'm alone : I'm not ready to show my scars to anyone, I can't tolerate someone really close cuz I know they will find out how fucked up I am , I'm afraid they might damage me or find a damage....which make me try to be a better person and decrease my imperfections ....I should wait another month or year , I need to accept this loveless life for another year ... I'm ... unlovable now

Ok I was foolish that believed I can make that kind of money for doing nothing, I was foolish that I trusted that guy any way , it's not the end of the world don't you remember that sometimes wrong trains take you to the right place???don't disrespect yourself, you're not foolish , they are tricky also Dear god , if he has lied to me , I want them to be lied and tricked as fuck , also I want him to remember me in that momenti can start 2 good YouTube chaels and make 2000 dollars money , and thادامه مطلب

Did tdr come back ?
did mhm come back ?
did all those boys come back ?
no

why the fuck are you waiting??? Whhhhy the fuuuuck you're listening to readingsss about himmmm ?

I thought it was different then othersssss

You felt the same about rest of them so shut the fuck up , stop thinking about him , waiting for him checking his profiles , stoooopppppp for god's sakeeeee

he's just the same , no magic , no story , no romance, its just you romantecising , pls don't waste time for a relationship which is over

I know all these thoughts is because I'm alone , when someone else talk to me I totally forget about him , this is not true love , stopppp please

if he's better without me while I'm drowning in his absence, let him be , let him take care of his plans , I'm not kaity waity

, ,

از همیشه دلم میخاست ک دوس دختر ادمای خیلی معروف رو ببینم و بفهمم ک کیو انتخاب کردن ، دلم میخاست طرف رو بشناسم ، دلم میخاست بدونم تو فضای پرایوتشون درمورد چی صحبت میکنن ، الان دوز دختر معروف ترین ادمی ک دورم هست رو دیدم و حاجی پشماممممم چقدر دااااف ، من در برابر اونا فقط ی جوجه رنگی ساده م اصلاح out of my league رو شنیدین ؟ واقعا هر کس داره تو ی لیگ بازی میکنه و لیگ ما معمولیا خیلی شلوغ هست و معمولی البته دوستام جام حذفی هستن من نتونستم صعود کنم البته اینا خنده های هیستریک هست اصلا جدی نگیرید ادامه مطلب